Sunday, October 17, 2010


Practicing two things- 1. alone time -time to think and figure out life. Wonder if this is what a mid life crisis looks  like? Not so much fun but needed.   2. Depth of field- having fun with this.

Monday, October 4, 2010

More Vegas

The view from our suite
                                                                        And looking the other way

more later...

Thursday, September 23, 2010


Some photos from a recent vacation. It was my first time to Vegas. What a trip! It's wild out there. I can't get over how BIG everything is. And how everyone (but me, lol) seemed to walk around with a alcoholic drink in their hands- at all hours of the day. There was so much to see- and not enough time to see it. Oh well, there's always next time.

I enjoyed walking around and seeing all the sights and people- I am a big people watcher. And I loved the pool- once I got over the fact that it was on the 22 floor of the hotel- I'm kinda, sorta afraid of heights. I loved just about everything I saw- the lights, the shows, everything. It did teach me that I need a tripod. I must have walked miles and miles every day. In fact- I walked so much (in flip flops) that a week after I came back I had to go to the doctor- my feet and legs were still swollen. Seems that spraining my ankle as I got off the plane in Vegas and then walking on it all week-(think tough Irish stock) did nothing to help the situtaion. I now have muscle and tissue damage to my left leg. Oh well, at least it wasn't the deep vein thrombosis the doctor first thought it was- so it was worth it. Memo to self...get rid of the flip flops.

I thought about deleting the photo at right but decided I like how it looks. 

More later...

Tuesday, June 29, 2010


It's a perfect summer day out- every day should be this beautiful.

But the beauty doesn't overcome my sadness.

Today would have been Lori's 47th birthday.

When did I get so old.

I wish she could get old with me.

I miss her. Some days more than others. I can go days without thinking about her, and then something will remind me of some event, big or small, that she shared with me. And I miss her all over again.

I thought it would get easier as time passed, and in some ways I guess it does. I no longer pick up my phone to call her and share some silly tidbit of daily life with her. In fact, I don't remember her phone number anymore.  That makes me sad.

I would have traded places with her. I really would have. I thought about that over this past weekend, as I observed my twins in their stepbrother's wedding, and thought of how grown up they are, and how proud of them I am. And how proud of them she would have been- she helped raise them too.

And then I thought of her babies and how they were too young when she died to really remember her. I would have gladly traded places with her if it had meant she would have been able to raise her children. My kids are grown, and while they would miss me, they have all those memories of growing up with me.

Her kids don't, and won't.

It doesn't seem fair.

And it makes me sad.

Happy birthday Lori, wherever you are. I hope your spirit is happy and know that your are without pain. That's something.

The flowers are for you...

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Another trip to DC

Just got back from our annual trip to DC. I am such a dork- I love that place. I had a blast with the new camera. Hopefully I will get some photos posted over the next few days. This is one of my favorite- just for the blue of the sky.

We had great weather- sunny and 80 most of the time. Can't beat that. We must have walked at least 20 miles a day- and my feet hurt enough to show it. There was a exhibition on the mall while we were there- public and armed services. It was really cool to be able to see, (and get in) the various equipment that is being used by the military to fight the war, from helicopters to humvees. The only down side to it was the protestors that forced it to close early. While I totally support people's right to free speech, and am not in total agreement (at all) with the reasons for this war, I do believe that the troops there deserve our support. They are doing there jobs. For people to mock, threaten and do other things to the service men and women is totally unacceptable.

While I was there I heard from my oldest son. Thank God! He's alive and well, and in...Iraq. Which does not thrill me at all. Seems he got a hair up his rear to take a job with some construction company that is rebuilding over there. I don't get it. But it's not my life. I will give him this, he checks in every few days to let me know he's ok, and sends me a text every now and then. Wonder how much that costs?- To call and text from over there? Seems so far away.

Until later...
blessings and love,

Saturday, April 10, 2010

A Beautiful Spring Day

HI! What a great day in Cincinnati. Wish it could be this perfect all year along, but then we would get complacent about it, wouldn't we? Let me tell you how great this camera is. Love it! Went down to Ault Park today- I think it was Ault- the one by Lunken Airport. Played around with the camera and lens. Fun times!
I decided that I want to do a study of lines- pleasing my graphic designer side here, so here are some of them...

I loved the contrast of this.

and this... I loved the texture of the tree- I'm sure that it's diseased, which is sad- but the bark was peeling, and created this incredible texture, and it "fit" with my lines.

The neatest thing about this camera- the ability to take as many photos as I like and then delete what I don't like and doesn't work. Pretty darn cool. More to come...


Tuesday, March 30, 2010

And so it begins...

Here's one of the first photos with my new toy. Not sure if you can see it, but there's a cardinal sitting in the tree. It's right outside my bedroom window, and this bird loves to start singing bright and early in the morning. This just doesn't do her justice- she was so bright against the cloudy sky. Oh well, photoshop can fix that eventually.
Here's the very first one taken with the camera- one of my favorite subjects- Madi- she thought she was going to get something. Little did she know...

Monday, March 29, 2010

Where Did March Go?

Where has this month gone? I was reading over my only post for this month, and was a little surprised to see that well, I only managed to post once, and two, not much has changed since that post. I still miss my son. I still worry about him. I still dream about him and wonder how he's doing. I emailed him the other day, but I haven't heard back from him. I wish I could say prayer is getting me thru this, but it's not working to well for me right now. Having a faith crisis or something like that.

Oh well- wanna hear the good news? I finally got my DSLR-- woo hoo!! Now if I could get some time to play with it. We're headed to DC in a few weeks, so that will be good practice. I can't wait to take photos of the monuments and use my wide angle lense! So cool.

More later. Maybe. Who knows...

Friday, March 12, 2010

Missing My Son

Sometimes as a parent it's hard to see the good we've done, and all too easy to see the bad. I feel this way today, as I miss and worry about my oldest. It's been months since I've seen or heard from him. We have no idea where he is, what he's doing, or how he's living. A part of me feels like it's not right that he "treat" his mom this way, and that a phone call isn't that much to ask. It's really not.
I wish I understood a little better his issues. I know being home wasn't good for him, or me for that matter. I understand that he needed to go. I just wish I knew where he had gone. I dreamed about him last night. It wasn't an earth shattering dream, and in it he wasn't doing the best- but he was around, and I could keep track of him.
TJ, if you happen to read this call me. If you don't remember my cell- which you never could, for some odd reason- call your sister, or send us a text or email or something. Please.
I miss you. I love you and I am praying that you are ok, and that you're getting things together and making progress making your life what you'd like it to be.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Being Happy

I think I stated in an earlier post that being happy is my goal for this year. It's kinda tough to figure out how to do this exactly. I started out thinking the other day what could I do to make myself happy. Lots of ideas, some a little short on funds to get to right now. Other things came to mind too, things that don't cost money- which is good. One of those things was to make sure I set aside time each night to do something for myself. So, I've been turning in early and reading before I fall off to sleep. It's been working. I have a stack of books, not to mention bookcases full, that I plan on reading BEFORE i buy or borrow any more. Now that's a huge goal, lol.
Then today, I thought, how about making other people happy. Maybe that's where it starts. So, i did something very simple today, and paid for something for someone who looked like they were having a bit of a hard time. A pay it forward typt thing. I got the biggest smile out of her, and had one myself too. It's the little things that make me happy...
Now, if i could just get a snow day. One to spend playing in the snow, making snow angels and sled riding. How fun would that be?

Saturday, January 2, 2010

2010 Day 2

Wonderful day today. Lots of baking. Some great recipes. I did figure out that I've spent a little too much time on church stuff this week, at least in my opinion. Designed the bulletin, printed and folded the bulletin, worked on a newsletter (that is taking a bit too long to get together), spent most of the day baking for church tomorrow- from scratch, mind you- banana bread, pumpkin bread, and a chocolate cinnamon coffee cake. How yummy does that sound?
So, what did I do for me today (thinking of being selfish here)? Well, I crocheted for me. I'm working on a throw for me- yes, for me. I never make anything for myself. So this is fun- the colors are great- neon pink, orange and lime green. Love it. The colors make me want to get it all done. Can't wait.
Oh well, time to find a good movie or curl up with a good book.

Here's the recipe for the coffee cake- Yummy!

1/2 c. butter
2 eggs
1/4 tsp. lemon juice
1 tsp. baking powder
1 c. dairy sour cream
1 tbsp. granulated sugar
1/4 c. chopped nuts
1 c. sugar
1 tsp. vanilla
2 c. flour
1 tsp. baking soda
1/4 c. brown sugar
1 1/2 tsp. cinnamon
Cream butter and 1 cup sugar until light. Add eggs, beating well. Add vanilla and lemon juice. Sift dry ingredients together. Add to creamed mixture alternately with sour cream. In small bowl mix brown sugar, 1 teaspoon sugar, cinnamon and nuts.

Pour half of batter into well-greased tube pan or 9 x 13 inch pan. Sprinkle brown sugar mixture on. Pour on remaining batter. Bake at 350 degrees for 45 to 50 minutes.

Friday, January 1, 2010


Wow, another year- heck, another decade. I'm not sure if I'm glad to see the old year go. I guess I'm just not sure about the old year at all. There weren't many highs or lows, just a bunch of in things betweens. I thought about setting New Year's resolutions, but they always get broken, don't they? So, after reflecting over the past year I came up with a few things. NOT RESOLUTIONS. Just things I want to do...
...I want to be happy. That might sound strange, but I figured out that for much of 2009 I was sad. Not unhappy, just sad. The kind of sad that makes it hard to get outta bed. The kind of sad that makes it hard to find happy in the small things. The kind of sad that made it hard to be around people, 'cause I just didn't have it in me to put on a happy face. I guess I did pretty well at hiding it- not many people seemed to catch on. Or maybe, not many people cared enough to ask? The kind of sad that was probably clinical, and needed help, which I didn't get. And probably won't get now. I don't feel as sad lately. I was dreading the holidays, for many reasons, but mostly because I was afraid they would make me sadder. They didn't. I got into decorating, although a little late, I got into shopping, and spent way too much, and I really got into the extra days off. Loved that part. So, that made me a little happier than I have been in a while. Which is good.
...I want to do more for me, and less for others. 2010 might just be the year of being incredibly selfish. I've never been a selfish person, so this might be a challenge, but one I'm willing to take on. I want to put me first for a change. I'm really not sure how that looks, or what it means, but it sounds good and feels right. So, we'll see.
...I want to develop a closer relationship with God, a more personal relationship. That might mean doing things that make me feel closer to Him. Reading, Prayer, Really loud worship music. Taking as well as giving. Heaven help me, but being a pastor's SO is really trying at times- and that makes church more a job than a worship experience. So, things on that front might change. Maybe I'll not do as much. Maybe I'll make a point to worship at a church that feeds me every week. Not sure on that yet either, but it feels right.
...I want to create. Which is great- the urge to do this hasn't been there in a long while. It's like a part of me, I need to create just as much as I need to breathe. I am totally enjoying having this feeling back. I hope it lasts. I hope I can create what is inside me. Stay tuned. Creating includes lots of things, one of them writing, and I'm sure that there will be lots of posts and hopefully plenty of artwork and photos to share.
Love and blessings,