Sometimes as a parent it's hard to see the good we've done, and all too easy to see the bad. I feel this way today, as I miss and worry about my oldest. It's been months since I've seen or heard from him. We have no idea where he is, what he's doing, or how he's living. A part of me feels like it's not right that he "treat" his mom this way, and that a phone call isn't that much to ask. It's really not.
I wish I understood a little better his issues. I know being home wasn't good for him, or me for that matter. I understand that he needed to go. I just wish I knew where he had gone. I dreamed about him last night. It wasn't an earth shattering dream, and in it he wasn't doing the best- but he was around, and I could keep track of him.
TJ, if you happen to read this call me. If you don't remember my cell- which you never could, for some odd reason- call your sister, or send us a text or email or something. Please.
I miss you. I love you and I am praying that you are ok, and that you're getting things together and making progress making your life what you'd like it to be.
Love,
mom
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